Dear Hiver,
May I encourage you to start journaling to cope with your conflicting thoughts and feelings about the situation? Journaling is helpful because it allows us to be honest about our emotions, while engaging our objective capacity to make meaning out of it and consider what we should do. As Christians, journaling is also an act of prayer in which we express our deepest thoughts and feelings to God, trusting that the Holy Spirit is with us and will guide us. Try the following:
- Find a comfortable time and place when you are unlikely to be disturbed.
- Writing by hand is best, but typing is also acceptable.
- Invite the Holy Spirit to be with you to help you be attentive to yourself and to Him.
- Write honestly and freely about your thoughts, and especially your feelings about the situation.
- Don’t censor or judge what you write. Don’t worry about grammar or handwriting. The only human audience is yourself. As for God, the Psalmists have shown us it is perfectly fine to be honest about how we feel with God.
- Write also about what you want to do in the situation, as tied in with your deeper goals and values. Listen to what God is calling your attention to.
- Do this at least four times, whether on consecutive days or spread out, and for at least 20 minutes each time. If 20 minutes feels too long, start with 10 minutes, and work your way up.
- Leave a space in your journal to record what you have learnt in a month’s time, and in six months’ time. You may be surprised to find how God has grown you through this experience.