Life & Faith

My 5-year-old son is in childcare. In the evenings and on weekends, my husband and I spend time with my son. This year, he told us he likes the colour pink, princesses, unicorns, glittery things, nail polish and dresses.

I have been married for more than ten years and have a child about 5 years old. For many years, I have tolerated my husband's anti-social behaviour and fixed ways. In the past, we visited a few churches, eventually settled down for a few years in a church and even served together in ministry.

Life can be very unpredictable and some may say unfair. This is especially so when things outside our control happen to us. This includes being born with a disability or into a family where the level of care falls short. Or being betrayed by someone we trust. Or being in the wrong place at the wrong time when hit by a crime. When we find ourselves in such circumstances, we feel like a victim.

My daughter went through a traumatic experience a few years ago because a friend abused her trust. She did not share about the incident with me or my wife. We realised something was wrong one day when we saw that she had cut marks on her wrist. When we confronted her, she broke down and shared about what had happened. We were shocked and did not know what to do. It has been a few months and I still feel angry and helpless. I want justice for my daughter, but she does not want to pursue the matter although she agreed to see a counsellor. I am struggling to come to terms with what happened. I pray for protection for my family, but why didn't God protect her? Why didn't she tell us then so that we could have done something about it? ~ Shocked Father

This year, as The Methodist Church of Singapore celebrates its 140 years in Singapore, Methodist Message (MM) collated a selection of my over 200 articles into a book entitled Restoration. Among the congratulatory messages received when the book was published, there was one unusual comment.

I have been married for five years now and my husband is a backslidden Christian. In the last one to two years, we have drifted apart as he is a ride-hailing driver and works during the night when I am asleep. We are no longer a couple but more like friends. We are headed towards divorce if this continues as he has no intention for any counselling or does not seem to want to work on the marriage. What should I do? ~ Confused

I have been married for more than 30 years. I do not have a healthy relationship with my husband as he tends to be critical and even verbally abusive. I've wanted to divorce him many times over the years but didn't because I know God does not want divorce and I stayed on because of the children. I bear with him because he came from a broken family and perhaps doesn't know better. Now that my children are grown up and things have not changed, I am thinking that I should think about myself in my later years. In fact, my children have encouraged me to leave my husband because of how he treats me. I have suggested going for counselling but my husband is not open to that. Even when I tried to explain how I felt, he ends up blaming me. I feel that I cannot go on any longer in this marriage and don't know what to do. ~ Exhausted

I'm a divorcee and I'm looking to get married again. My ex-wife and I divorced because of her money habits. She had lent various people/family members over $40k without telling me and had issues about saving money, amongst other issues that led to mental neglect. Our divorce was not due to infidelity. Now, I have found someone that I would like to settle down with and give marriage a second try. Would it be okay for us to get married in a Methodist church? Would a Methodist pastor be able to solemnise our wedding? If not, would it be okay to use the church hall but have a non-Methodist pastor solemnise our wedding? ~ Joseph

Life can be very unpredictable and some may say unfair. This is especially so when things outside our control happen to us. This includes being born with a disability or into a family where the level of care falls short. Or being betrayed by someone we trust. Or being in the wrong place at the wrong time when hit by a crime. When we find ourselves in such circumstances, we feel like a victim.

My nearly-adult teenage son does well in school both academically and in CCAs. However, he gets into trouble every year for talking back to his teachers. Some teachers absolutely adore him; they are the ones who see his heart. But teachers that are "not nice" will bear the brunt of his talkback because he has no respect for either their poor teaching skills or their difficult personalities. He is often the one at fault, but I don't know how to get him to rein in his tongue. ~ Fed-up Mama

I am friends with a couple and have known the husband and wife for nearly a decade now. On the outside, they look like the perfect couple—stable jobs, great kids, nice house, God-fearing family. However, both the husband and wife confide in me separately and share their deepest, darkest secrets with me. They do not know that I am hearing both sides of their stories. I have told them to talk to each other in my separate chats, or to consider couples counselling. How should I tell them I do not want to be involved and that it's too much for me? ~ Friend in the middle

My husband of 25 years told me he fell in love with someone my daughter's age. He says he has never felt this way before. I consider this infidelity. He does not because he says he is fighting his feelings. I am so hurt. Is he right? Am I too sensitive? How can I be with a man who doesn't love me but loves someone else? ~ Broken