You & Your Family

  I RECENTLY GAVE MYSELF a little treat and made a short trip back to the “old country”. Singaporeans may have several “old countries” or countries of their forefathers, depending on how far back they trace their ancestry. For me, on my mother’s side, it is Kuching, Sarawak. My visit coincided with the Dawai or […]

  “Sometimes, differences are experienced in an obviously pointed and painful manner. When this happens, I hope we will be prepared to allow God’s grace to work in and through us to make these relationships work better.”   I OFTEN JOKE WITH MY WIFE that she is my cure for the disease of punctuality. Some […]

  A MISSIONARY WHO HAD RETURNED from the mission field was sharing with me some of the things he had observed, having lived abroad for some time. One was how accustomed we urbanites have grown to the noise around us that we do not notice it at all. It was only when he lived in […]

  LET ME BEGIN WITH A BRIEF WORD about the choice of this topic. Some might think it rather inappropriate for a Christian magazine. Others might feel rather uncomfortable about reading it. Still others might wonder if the topic of having sex should even be accompanied by the word good. All the renowned Christian writers […]

  RIGHT RELATIONSHIP “We begin this process of forgiveness not based on the merits of the individual to be forgiven or even our desire to want to rebuild our relationship. We begin with the sincere desire to be in a right relationship with God.”   READERS OF MY PREVIOUS CONTRIBUTION to Methodist Message would have […]

  WHEN A BAD AND UNEXPECTED THING happens to us, we often ask why. We want to know the reasons why it occurred. Nowhere is the search for rationale more pressing than when the distress is caused by someone we love and trust. I have often heard this question raised by the hurt party to […]

  “WHAT IS HAPPY?” is is the question that I often pose to my wife in response to her query about whether I am happy. It is a reply that I sometimes use to deflect her probing, but it also stems from a genuine uncertainty about the meaning of happiness or how one is supposed […]

  “We do not have to be enormously wealthy in order to help … You do not have to look too far for the needy. They are all around us, perhaps even sharing a pew with you.”   I CONFESS THAT I SOMETIMES SHED TEARS watching these episodes. What I find moving is seeing grown […]

  IN A FEW WEEKS’ TIME, members of some churches will be experiencing a change that is familiar to many, but not to all, church organisations; that is the rotation of its pastoral staff. This move happens in every church and is greeted with mixed responses by the congregation. For most, it is felt as […]

  “I REHABILITATE DOGS AND I TRAIN OWNERS.” Mr Cesar Milan, who appears on the popular TV series “The Dog Whisperer” on the National Geographic Channel, reminds viewers of this dictum throughout the programme. I must say that as a Marital and Family Therapist who has seen some families bringing in their troublesome children for […]

  A FEW WEEKS AGO, my wife and I were surprised when we noticed a bird’s nest being built on the palm plant in our tiny enclosed yard. This unusual siting of the nest meant that it is just three metres away and at eye-level. To people like us who admire nature and try with […]

  ERIC ERICKSON, A FAMOUS PSYCHOLOGIST, introduced the theory that everyone develops through eight phases. One of these is the stage of Generativity versus Self-absorption or at times described as Generativity versus Stagnation, which was the subject of recent discussion between my client and me. She is in her mid-50s and had sought help for […]